Genuine Genuine Shit
Genuine? Genuine shit!
Here’s a ball-buster for you:
‘Genuine’ leather is the second-worst type of leather there is.
That’s right. It’s actually shit leather, treated and cut up to be made to look like a real leather piece.
This got me thinking – what else is thought of as ‘good’ but actually isn’t? Well NZ’ers, buckle up, you might hear some things that aren’t nice.
1: Most of the Kiwifruit consumed in NZ is actually imported.
I went back home in February, and immediately jumped in to the food cupboard, wanting some actual taste after 2 years in London. After having what seemed like the best Kiwifruit I’ve ever tasted – turns out it was from Italy. Turns out, continental Europe get all our best Kiwifruit. If you wan’t good NZ goods, move to Spain.
2: Overseas, NZ meat is considered cheap, and ‘middle to low grade’
We are brought up thinking we are the tits, but overseas, the cheap cuts of lamb are most often from NZ. After a bit of research, I found that even our top cuts of export lamb are considered ‘middle grade’ meat – most overseas consumers find it too ‘muttony’ or gamey. The same goes for our beef too. In school, being told we are the best in the meat trade is almost like a pledge of allegiance, and this surprised me.
3: Almost every single underground line is ripping you off for the price.
Two years of study by the scientists at ftb.com have made an astounding discovery – aside from only ONE line, the underground is ripping you off more than a Romanian shell game on Westminster Bridge.
How you ask?
All underground lines cost the same. For the same price as the Victoria Line (which is perfectly in equilibrium pricing) the other lines have the nerve to charge the same for their shit service. No wonder the Northern Line has the most suicides – by far.
Experts have found the VL suicides are actually from old people, wanting the see the old girl at their last moments.
Let me know if there are any topics you would like me to cover on ftb.com. Cheers for tuning in.
Posted on November 21, 2017